Today is World Poetry Day, and as everyone knows, being a poet is not just about your lyrical prose, it’s also about the look. Helpful lot that we are, we’ve put together some quick tips to transform you into a modern-day bard in no time.
Get a pair of glasses
First off, the right pair of glasses is critical. Everyone knows that people who wear glasses are considered more intelligent (and sexier, but I digress). So start your poetic journey with this pair of Emporio Armani glasses. Round and owlish, just like real poets, right?
Get the clothes
Whatever you wear, and however you choose to wear it, you can’t do any worse than Dolly Parton. I bet you didn’t know that she was also a poet, did you? Well, she is. And as everyone knows, Dolly Parton oozes class.
Blokes, get the professor of poetry look from actor, Viggo ‘Lord of the Rings’ Mortenson, also a poet and proud owner of his very own poetry publishing company, Perceval Press.
Get the attitude
Being a good poet is all about drama. Take it from Charlie Sheen, original bad boy and – believe it or not – poet. His book of poetry, A Peace of My Mind, was published in 1990. Here are a few lines from his poem, A Goat in My Ass.
There’s a goat in my ass,
Living mainly on grass.
They say the creature was stolen,
Yet he feeds on my colon.
If you’re more into depression than bad boy drama, take a boat trip down the River Thames and mooch your way all through the journey wearing these John Lennon style Police sunglasses, designed to protect your sensitive, poetic eyes from the pressure of it all.
Get the right books
Establish your credentials as a street poet by carrying a copy of The Rose that Grew from Concrete, rapper Tupac Shakur’s book of poetry.
Or you could get Alicia Keys’ Tears for Water. We think Alicia has got the poet look down to a fine art.
Get a similar look with this Ray-Ban Aviator prescription glasses:
My glasses poetry
‘My, what beautiful glasses you have,’ he said
‘All the better to see you with,’ I said.
Yes, I know. It’s awful, awful poetry – that’s if you can call it that. But if you think you can do better, why not join the Poetry Society.